GALLSTONE!

topic posted Sun, March 7, 2004 - 1:43 PM by  Victor
Ashcroft hospitalized with severe pancreatitis

Friday March 5, 2004

By SHANNON MCCAFFREY
WASHINGTON - Attorney General John Ashcroft spent Friday in the intensive care unit of a Washington hospital with a severe case of pancreatitis, a painful condition expected to sideline him for at least a week

On rare occasions the illness can be fatal, according to medical experts. Doctors expect to know more about Ashcroft's condition in the coming days.

Believing he had a stomach flu, Ashcroft canceled an appearance in Alexandria, Va., on Thursday where he was scheduled to discuss guilty verdicts handed down in a terrorism case. Instead, he went home and his condition worsened. White House physician Dr. Daniel Parks visited Ashcroft and instructed him to go to the emergency room.

After a complete exam, doctors at George Washington University Hospital diagnosed him with a severe case of gallstone pancreatitis. He was admitted to the intensive care unit at the downtown Washington hospital, where he's being monitored closely and treated with antibiotics, according to Justice Department spokesman Mark Corallo.

Pancreatitis, in which the pancreas is inflamed, can be caused by excessive consumption of alcohol or, in Ashcroft's case, a gallstone that becomes lodged in the bile duct blocking the passage of digestive enzymes into the small intestine.

The condition can become dangerous when other organs, such as the kidneys or stomach, become infected or the production of insulin by the pancreas is blocked, said Dr. Anthony Kalloo, a specialist in pancreatic disease at John Hopkins University Hospital in Baltimore.

Symptoms include sudden and intense abdominal pain, nausea, vomiting and fever.

"It is very painful," Kalloo said. " I feel sorry for him."

In most cases, the gallstone eventually passes through the small intestine on its own, but sometimes a device must be threaded through the digestive tract to remove the gallstone.

Some 80,000 people suffer from pancreatitis every year, Kalloo said, and some 10 percent of those cases are classified as severe, as Ashcroft's was. In the most severe cases, the death rate can be 15 percent, he said.


It's the first serious illness for Ashcroft, 61, who played football at Yale University and stays fit with regular games of basketball at the FBI gym.
posted by:
Victor
  • Unsu...
     

    Re: GALLSTONE!

    Mon, March 8, 2004 - 11:31 AM
    Ow! I've got a pain in my stomach.
    Ow! I feel a bit flummoxed.
    Oy! I've got nausea, I'm vomiting, a fever!

    Whoa! Could it be too much drinking?
    No! I'm totally tee-totaling.
    Where?! The hospital, to Jesus, or neither?

    They say I am a tight-ass
    But it's just pancreatits.
    What page in the Bible
    Will guide me, I'm liable
    To yell at the top of my lungs:

    Jesus Christ this is a fucking pain!
    Did I just take His name in vain?!
    A gallstone's in my bile duct,
    Without my work, this country's fucked.

    Ow! I've got a pain in my stomach.
    Ow! I feel a bit flummoxed.
    Oy! I've got nausea, I'm vomiting, a fever!

    Whoa! Could it be too much drinking?
    No! I'm totally tee-totaling.
    Where?! The hospital, to Jesus, or neither?
    • Re: GALLSTONE!

      Mon, March 8, 2004 - 1:16 PM
      Somehow we fit this in with a gallstone marble shooting contest in the recovery room between our protagonist and his fellow stoners.
    • Re: GALLSTONE!

      Mon, March 8, 2004 - 1:39 PM
      what an absolutely great song, noah. I say that we stage it at the FBI gym to take place after one of ASHCROFT!s aforementioned basketball games. the male chorus in towls, johnny vomiting and exclaiming 'oy!' as he's taken into the secret service ambulance. then howard dean could treat him at the hospital.

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